Fist full of update

The lack of news being put up lately is due to me not feeling like doing an update, not for lack of news. My surgery to get the polyp removed was cancelled. Apparently the urologist got drunk and put his hand through a sliding glass door. Which would explain why they called of a Friday surgery with a few days notice. I am sure it had nothing to do with someone wanting a long weekend. The whole thing is being put off for a month, and since there has been no bleeding since about Halloween I don't have much of an issue with that.

Saw the doctor this week, everything still status quo. One of the people I went to boot camp with got a new set of lungs. I have mixed feelings about this. This man deserved a set of lungs, he had a little girl and wife, and an obvious lust for life. He is young and will do what he has to to make sure he gets a long and full life. It is awesome and great, but I still feel shitty. We are not the same blood type, so we weren't competing for the same parts, but I still feel passed over. I have the same feeling I might get if I was to hear all my friends talking about a party they were at on the weekend that I didn't receive an invitation too. It just bums me out waiting this long, the longer I wait the more chance for problems there are.

Prime example being that I am slipping big time with the work outs. Even with the whole being sick last month and having a minor cold this month my work outs have been way to few and far between. And I am starting to see the back slide, and it is spelled out in giant flaming letters. My weight is up(and I look it) and my endurance is down. Not to where it was before boot camp mind you, but it is lower than when I first got home in September. After going up the stairs it takes longer to recover than it did in the fall, and the muscle tone I had is not as apparent. There is only one way to fix this, and that is to go back to the five days a week, full body work out, every weekday, no exception. No more picking my days off. If I miss the workout in the morning for some reason than I have to do it at night. If I am really having an issue that day I still need to do the treadmill and the leg work out. That will address the weight issue(which I am only really concerned about because it will only go up with all the Christmas baking that is in the house right now)and will keep my lungs from deteriorating.

Other things in life are going well. Yule was great this year, I am all ready for Christmas, I have been getting out to see people a little more. Just waiting.

The bearding

Behold the beard in its waning glory.

Insert jive-ass title here

Lack of jive-assness aside, things have been going okay for me. Lungs are stable, other health concerns have cleared up, and I have even managed to get out and have some fun in the last few weeks. My work outs are not where I would like them to be, as in not intense and five times a week, but I have gotten into a routine of doing it every other day. That is more than I was doing last month so I will take it and run. With the winter eating season fast approaching I will have to step the exercise to stay in the ideal weight zone the doctors have set out. I know I won't pass up baking and other tastiness so I will have to burn it off.

In beard related news I am rockin the caveman look right now, and really not enjoying it as much as I thought I would. I figured I would have gotten the call the go up to Edmonton by now and it would be shaved off. Now it is at the point where even I know it looks rather bad. I would shave it back to just the goatee, but the whole play off beard was started as kind of devotion/good luck charm concept. Cutting it off now would seem to be counter to that. It boils down to vanity. I would rather not look like a scum bag all the time(just some of the time when it is called for), and the caveman beard is rather scum baggy. With Yule and Christmas coming up there will lots of picture taking, and one must leave the best possible record in the history books (yes I am egotistical enough to think my life will go into history books, if you don't feel the same way you lack vision and should feel bad about yourself). Whether it stays or goes will likely boil down to me having some spare time one day and shaving it off out of boredom.

I see the doctors next week, and should have some health related news to up date with then. Not likely to be anything new, but a reason to update nonetheless.

Noes tube, the latest thing

Yes I am on noes-tube, it is the latest thing! But rather than showing fun cat related videos it is literally a tube that is shoved up my noes and down my throat. As part of the testing I was doing back in the summer, I needed to have an esophageal motility study. These however needed to be books months in advance so I did not get to do mine till this morning. And what super luck I have, it is only done at the hospital across town and at 7am.

I tolerated the tube going in much better than I thought I would, and so far it has not given me much trouble. I am still trying to make up my mind as to whether or not I will go shopping today, and if I do go out it will not be to the mall. With the crowds they way they are the 'Bump' factor is rather high. With a tube coming out of my nose, and it being held in place by the mother of all breath-right stripes, I look rather stupid ass well.. But looking like a weirdo has not kept me out of the public for twenty seven years, why let it stop me now.

It all comes out tomorrow morning, so between then and now all I have to do record what I eat and drink, when I lay down and sit up, and if I puke. Oh and don't get the tube caught on anything or pull it out, that may sour the result some.

It is so refreshing...

To get hospitalized for a problem not related to my lung issues for once. Yes, yet again our hero was plunged back into the icky-ness which is the hospital because the health dropped off. This time it was from very bad dehydration. Apparently you can actually poop yourself sick and not have to live in the third world to do it. After a month of problems with my GI track I bit the bullet and went into see the doctor about it. I was given IV fluids and told to come into the unit if I didn't improve over the weekend. Saturday afternoon I checked into the hospital.
Now this is going to be one of those white whine moments, but I got the one room on the ward that had a broken tv. I should just be happy to have readily avalible world class healthcare and not bitch, but my screaming war gods I wanted to eat my own skin I was so bored. But lucky for me I had all that sample collecting and 'oscopies' to keep my busy. Because nothing says fun like having to wash down your pills with four liters of laxative, it like having to prep for prom all over again.
You might have guessed by now that I can handle myself around the medical types. I know what questions they ask when they want to know about certain conditions and I know what answers are relavent(usually). I know what to look out for with my medical conditions and when to bring them up. I know that if a doc wants to rule out rising blood pressure I can tell him whether or not I have: blurred vision, dizzyness, headaches, and if those things change when I stand or sit. I can get through a medical accessment in about 2 minutes with a brand new doctor, I'm that badass. I was doing just that with one of my lung doctors, but at the end of all the usual questions I got a bit of a curve ball. "So how are the spirits holding up?" I know that my psychological health is a concern for them, it's just that I am rarely just asked straight up about it. Well I should say the question asked and the person asking actaully caring about the answer beyond the initial greeting the question was intended to be. I told him I was doing okay, just hoping that things could start moving forward more. He told me that the hardest part about the transplant was the waiting, most often it is even harder than the recovery at times. The time taken to be a human being to another person goes farther than you think, something to keep in mind durung your day to day life.
After all the tests, and about 4 lost kilograms, the experts are laying the blame on a medication that I have been taking(and tolerating) for years. Turns out that yes a side effect can just jump up out of no where like that. So now that it has been removed and everything else has settled down I am back on the street. This shakes my confidence in the science side of medicine a bit, in that it spotlights that for all the certainty of it, nothing works all the time for everyone. But when the human touch in medicine comes though as it did, the other stuff doesn't get to you as deep.

Are you there God, It's me Margaret..I mean Peter

Last week I had to go to the ER, it wasn't anything major, but I wanted to hold back about it until I had more information. That and it's gross and embarrassing. I will say right off the bat that I am okay so do not panic. Last Tuesday while taking a pee there was some blood, and my wam-a-doodle (sorry if I'm getting overly technical here) continued to leak blood after I was done peeing. Even though it was a small amount of blood I freaked out and called health link. They said I should go to the  emergency room to make sure it was not bladder/kidney related. After a few hours in the ER(again PLC does a great job with their ER) I was told that there was no evidence of infection from either my blood work or urine sample. The doctor there set me up with an appointment with an urologist for a week later. That was comforting in a way, at least that way I knew it wasn't anything life threatening.
The next morning I found some slight spotting in my underwear, and was over joyed that I had finally blossomed into womanhood. When it happened the next day and the day after that there was less joy and more spray and wash. So I got into the see the urologist today and they gave me a Cystoscopy. That means they put a spy cam up your pee hole. Now in case this isn't universally understood, any medical procedure ending in "oscopy' means you are going to get a camera shoved where the sun don't shine and it will be rather unpleasant. I was frozen for it, but to put in the freezing they inject this gel into the urethra. To top it all off they inject saline into your bladder. It was the damnest feeling in the world, like a reverse pee. The whole thing took about 10 minutes, and they found the issue. A small polyp that isn't going to be hard to remove. The doctor said he could have removed right there and then. However I was complaining like five year with a skinned knee by that point, so they are going to bring me back later so I can get some head candy while they do everything.
It all turned out to be nothing too horrible or menacing, and it shan't keep me from having the transplant, Just a minor scare for Halloween. Again my genitals prove to be an endless source of amusement. Any jokes regard "size", "kissing it better", and "that time of the month" have already been made, but feel free to give it a shot.

Token update

Nothing new to report, just doing an update so that people know I am still just sitting here waiting for the call. I will do another post soon after I am done seeing the doctors this week, or if any news pops up.

For those of you staying current...

The blog has been left un-updated for more than a week because I do not really having anything to say. I felt a little low this week lung wise, but that could be contributed to the new mattress. Free tip: if you have bad joints and issues where your chest needs to expand easily, stay the hell away from plush top mattresses. After switching to an old firmer bed I slept better than I had in days. I will just have to use that old bed until the store drops off the new firmer mattress I ordered this weekend. The whole situation will be all sorted out in a week or so.
Most of my days are now being spent watching X-files, and trying to reorganize my room and office. After cleaning out the basement to set up the home gym, a lot of crap got tossed out. I decided that it might be a good idea do the same thing in my personal space. I usually do not collect massive amounts of stuff, and I do a major clean to get rid of the clutter every few years. So this was less of a cleaning and more of just putting everything in its proper place to make both the office and room work better. Text books and other reference stuff go in the office. Games and fiction books go in the bedroom. Old school stuff goes in the trash(second year anthropology notes aren't worth the space they take up, and all my papers are save on electronic backups). The goal being to get both rooms set up so that doing anything in there, be that cleaning/dressing/writing/etc, can be done as easily as possible with nothing getting in the way.
Why blather on about this(besides not having anything else to say)? I would not say I do not have a nostalgic side to myself, I very much do. However I am very careful not to get hung up longing for the good ol' days. I often see people buying old toys off of E-bay, watching cartoons that were on TV when they were younger, or planning a vacation to the same place they used to go as a child. That is fine, I will not be the grinch who stole fun and tell someone not to do this. I will however point that it is impossible to relive or buy back the past. Yes we all have pleasant memories, and they fill us with warm fuzzy feelings. What I hope people know is that you may not get the same fuzzy feeling now that you did then. Going out for ice cream on a Sunday nights when you were a kid are not the same as when you are an adult and have to flip the bill. The plot holes and repetition of a child's TV show may be more glaring under a more experienced eye.
This is something I have struggled with. I wanted very badly to return to the past where everything was simpler. No medication, no overt health issues, no monthly appointments. That will never happen, and I can except that now. Life is going to suck hard, and will continue to do so in many ways. I also know that I am not special in this way, it happens to everyone, its called reality. We edit our memories to only remember the sweet victories or the simple pleasures, and never seem to dwell on all the time we have lost standing in line behind some jerk-off at the bank or 7-11. Life may be rough for me, but it never rules out the chance to make more good memories. They will not be happy for all the same reasons my happy memories from the past are, but they will be happy. And in the years to come I will look back on the new ones with just as much longing as I did for a past with good health.Treasure the past, but live for the future. And I am sure I can remember it all without having boxes of stuff kicking around to remind me about it.
Wow, lots of stuff write for a day I didn't have anything to talk about.

IT'S A MYSTERY GANG!

Friday night I drank a ton of soda and watched a scary movie, so Saturday I got to go mattress shopping. I has been close to 15 or more years since I had a new mattress so I figured I could afford to...spring for one. There was a sale on at the same place I got my couch, which happened to next door to a place that sold air purifiers, and it was all near an excellent burger place. A good friend recommend I get an air purifier after i bought one and noticed a marked change in his own breathing. So I picked up the same model he had gotten, which I save 200 dollars on.
When I got home there was mystery waiting for me. A shopping bag was out side the door, it contained a board game and a note, but did not say whom it was from. This was an enigma that need some solving, so as soon as I unpacked the game and made a few race cars(cause I'm not gonna build with Lego when i have it right there, pfft, you're dreamin), I put on my junior detective hat and set to work.
Several things could be deduced about the send from examining the bag and what they must know about me in order to have delivered it undetected. 1- the note was written on a note pad from the SAIT graphic design department. 2- the note read 'for Pete', elimination all senders who exclusively call me Peter. 3- the killer sender knows I enjoy Lego and board games. 4- The game itself is for ages seven and up, but for 3 or more players, thus the sender knows my age but not how many friends have. 5- the sender kicks ass because they send me a game that is really ballin. 6- the send knows that I won't kill in cold blood, but would kill in self-defense or during a time of war. 7-none of this really mattered because my mom told me who it was when she got home.
So I told Mr. S. Spade that I resign from the PI firm, the end.
PS the Air purifier is wonderful, quiet and effective.

No time to come up with a good title

Just a quickie before I go to bed. My cold is getting better. My lungs and breathing don't seem to be getting worse, all the other symptoms are tapering out, and I (despite my own efforts to be a lazy sack of crap) still do the work out everyday. Still not getting all of it done everyday, but most of it is.
Getting a little long term minded about things and not journeying out into the big scary world lately. If I can just do the hermit thing for a few months(or however long it takes) till I get the new lungs I will have my life back. I just would like a life to back to when that time comes. With technology where it is at today I can stay in contact with people from anywhere. I mean come on, I attended the weekly game night my friend hosts at his place here in Calgary EVERY WEEK while i was in Edmonton. That however lacks the kind of quality interaction you get face to face. Talking to some one isn't the same as doing something WITH them. Going out to 'events' is not much of an option anymore, but small gathering where I know the guest list and whether they are health is. Again planning going over to friend's house to watch a moving should not as difficult as a space launch, but it has to be for now. I need to look to the future: always forward and never backward, always upward and never forward. And always whirling, whirling, whirling....forgot where I was headed with this, so I am just gonna back out of the room now.

Well gee...this is lame

I'm have a cold. I went out around people twice in the last week, and now I have a sore throat and stuffed up nose. First thing I would like to say is if you have a cold, just stay home you stupid scum. The rest of us don't need you spreading your contagion around unnecessarily. And I use the term unnecessarily because I was nowhere anyone HAD to be this week. These weren't work places, or a place with booked appointments you can't get out of, or a one time event. No this was some plague rat showing up where, and I am echoed by plenty of others on this, they would not be missed. Having said all that I am well aware of the level of personal responsibility here, I didn't HAVE to be at these places either, and being the one with the weak immune system I should keep that in mind. But really, if you have had a cold in the last week, don't be going up the guy wearing oxygen and try to give him a hug. I am sure other people would like it if you carriers would just stay home a little bit longer too, No one likes being sick. And FYI you're not a doctor or other medical professional, so you don't know whether or not you are still contagious.
Okay the bitching part is out of the way, on to other things. Workouts are being broken up into two parts most days, not by design, but more just from it taking all day to do them. So the policy of starting early has payed off. Even on the rest days I have tried to do some treadmill, just to stir things up a bit. I am getting a better flow with the work out, I know what to start with and the transitions are getting smoother, but it is still slower than before. If I keep up the work I should have more successful/properly completed days. 

And now we play the waiting game

After six weeks I have made it back to Calgary for a good, for now. WE packed up the apartment, stored the things we were going to use when we return for the transplant, dropped off the modem at the providers office and made it home with only a minor incident. That being a truck blowing a tire directly behind us on the highway. We were unharmed, as was the everyone else on the road, but it was pant-crappingly loud.
I am glad  the program is done, this means I can move on to the next step, but I have noticed a few things that are less pleasant since being home. One being that I am feeling the same way you would feel at the end of the school term or after a race; spent and ready for rest. That "time to sit and be merry" feeling, which in some cases is fine. But now it is more like momentum killer. I tired doing a work out on Friday and I got through most of it, but I did not have near the same push I did before. This may be the switch from machines to free weights, the 500 meter rise in elevation, or having to stop and re-set up the weights every time I switch exercises but it just wasn't there like it was before.
Now this could all be just due to me being sick. Yes Peter has the sniffles, and by sniffles I mean I have been coughing up yellow stuff for a few days now. I knew by about Thursday that something wasn't quiet right, Friday after the workout I saw all the writing on the wall. So I got up Saturday had breakfast, showered and got dressed and headed over to the PLC. I called ahead to Lung doctor on call, like I was told by the team in Edmonton, and she said come down to the emergency department and tell them to page her when i got there. Total time from me getting there to leaving with what I needed...four hours. I got admitted, x-rayed, did blood work, saw the doctor, and got the prescriptions I needed in that time. I have had scheduled appointments that took longer than that. They do an amazing job getting you in, getting you where you need to be, and getting things ready for the next person when you're done. Really can't say enough good things about them right now. Yeah I destroyed my(and my mom's) Saturday, but I am out ahead of a possible lung infection before it can get a foot hold, so i would throw this in the win box.
My back is still bothering me. I should go get a massage or something to loosen it up. I got a heating pad and it seems to help a bit, though the problem it more likely something that needs time a rest to heal. If that was it I would just skip the upper body part of the work out and focus on the legs(which i am probably going to do anyway). The issue being when you have a sore back it can make it painful to take deep breaths. So even without realizing it to keep you from hurting yourself you body takes smaller breaths. This shallow breathing means that deeper airways don't open up and clear out the goo that can build up, and you get place for bugs to grow. Hens the issue I had to deal with this weekend.
Thus the landing back on home turf wasn't as bad as going from a pickup truck onto a gravel road, but it didn't feel like bouncing into a swimming pool full of teddy bears either. As long as I bounce back from this slump quickly I don't see it impacting my overall progress

Rider

Quick add on here, my phone was slightly buggered the last month or so, not receiving emails or text messages. Should be straightened out now. So please forgive me for any communicables I might not have returned, it is my provider being a tool department.

LAST WEEK!!!

It's my last week in Edmonton, I'm excited. So far I'm keeping busy getting things closed down here: getting the final walk through for the apartment set up, canceling the internet(for after I leave), having my oxygen provider come get the concentrator on Friday. In clinic this week I have one class and the ICU tour. The doctor today seemed to think I have nothing to worry about (possibly some issues with thrush/yeast in the throat, they gave me some anti-fungal pills), and just keep doing what I'm doing.
My new support person gets a passing grade for the first day. Didn't take too long to get him broken in, and he only had to be told once that the water bottle gets a little warm if you carry it under your arm. But didn't deliberately try to embarrass me, which is good behavior for him.
The last five weeks have definitely paid off looking back. It is all just numbers on a page when I'm in the gym comparing how much longer I can walk on the treadmill, or if I increased the weight on your vertical row. It is another to be able to say I can go up the long, steep staircase to the comic store and not have to stop part way, and only take 10 seconds to catch my breath. Or that carrying my bag(loaded with my water bottle iPad and lunch) and not have to ask someone to carry it for me. Those are the good days, and there are ones when I'm feeling like a sack of crap, but I know that when it comes to the surgery I'll be bouncing back faster than I would be without the program.

Week five: continued ass kicking

Well week number five is wrapping up, and I am ready to come home. The program has been great, and the time has passed rather quickly, but I would like to be home for more than a weekend. To be able to not need to look up direction whenever I leave the house, to not have to web-conference for game night, to have access to larger social circle than my mom and the chatty clerk at the corner store. I'm not miserable, or incredibly discontent, I just feel that the time has been put in and I ready to move on. It would be better if that was moving on to new lungs, but I'll take my own bed for now. We did have a lovely dinner last night with the people who housed us for the first two weeks we were here, so nice to see them again. I may complain about having no friends up here, but I do in fact have several wonderful people to visit with and see during my stay,and they have all be super to me.
The classes this week were a little tougher mentally than any of the other ones. Where as the doctors have not been sugar coating the information and being straight forward, these speakers were straight up blunt. They scared the hell out some people by quoting the rather grim statistics. I, having heard all of these numbers back in May, was...just as scared, cause hey this is scary shit sometimes. THESE ARE THINGS I NEED TO HEAR. No matter what I have to be informed, and aware of whats ahead to me. To plan my way physical trough training, mentally by knowing whats coming at me, and spiritually by hedging my bets with all the applicable deities. Five years out, ten years out, maybe some of the people in that class room won't be there. But I know that ten years ago it was science fiction that I could instantly watch a movie on a 1/4 inch thick piece of plastic. In a few years medical science will advance and those number will improve.
As usual I'm in Calgary this weekend, then my dad will be coming back with me for the last week. I think I celebrate the last week by dressing a pirate on Monday/

Sup?

Back in Eddy's town, I have to say the drives to and from have gone swimmingly thus far(knock on wood). Now I haven't been the one driving (my night vision is rather poor), so I maybe out to lunch completely on the last comment, but no speeding tickets so far.
The doctor today, and it was a new one I haven't met before, said everything is still looking good. No new tests to run, and he answered all my questions. Turns out that once we are done the boot camp I only have to come back up to Edmonton every three months or so, until I get the transplant that is.
This weekend was productive. I managed to get out have a good Saturday out with friends, had a birthday dinner for my mom with family, acquired a weight set/bench/squat rack used for a very good price, and did a blood test for the docs. The dinner was nice, and having the whole family together really adds a feeling of normality to my life. With the weights and the coming of a treadmill I won't have any problem keeping up the fitness routine that I have started up here when I return to Calgary. I doubt I will get Conan strong (everyone needs to go waste two hours of their life to see that movie btw, its awesome) but if I get my heart in better shape, and build up my legs more, I will feel much better about going into surgery. Oh also, funny story, if I need a blood test for vitamin D and E levels it is better to wait a week and do it in Calgary rather than Edmonton. Know why? The results will get to my doctor faster. Yeah, I'm unimpressed with some aspects of the health care system.
This week is slightly busier week, lots of classes, so I will need to make the most of my down time. Today I had a nap and watched netflixs, tomorrow we are going to tea. After that I might do some shopping (I need new socks), but I will have to play it by ear as the work outs still leave me feeling like a beaten dog till around lunch time.

Workouts are getting longer

Whats long and hard on Peter? Second grade...and the morning workout. My physio guy added in two new stations for me today(both arms, which had be somewhat lacking before), putting me up to ten total. With me doing 3 sets of 10, 20-25 minutes of cardio, and stretching I am fairly tired by the end of it. The whole thing takes me about an hour and half to do, depending on how busy the gym is. I'm going to start increasing the cardio part on daily bases now, either by the amount of time, speed or grade. That is an easy way to make gains, just 15 more seconds everyday, or just 0.2 more on speed. I have increased the weight on some of the stations, but like I said in a few post back, I would like to see them all farther along from where they are now. I have however noticed some improvements body wise. Calves and arms are toning up a little more, a little less jiggle then before, so I'm happy about that.
The classes this week were light, stuff I'm old hat with, but I go to anyway cause I want my gold star for attendance. Emotional/spiritual well being and Nutrition: hand holding, crying, and the four food groups...anyone else flash back to kindergarten. Much of the Nutrition stuff seem rather obvious, I can't think of anyone out there who hasn't heard "eat more vegetables" or "reduce your salt, and don't eat junk food", but they say they are out there. I was good to hear about body mass index and that stuff, and everything in general is good review so I can say for certain that I am doing it correctly. Emotional well being....meh. Everyone who knows me will tell you that I am 100% emotionally and spiritually fulfilled at every waking moment of everyday, for all time. But again I go because it is on my list of things to do. None of the patients wanted to go, and two out of five didn't, so things went quickly. I like knowing that the resource is there if I want it, and that the group of people I'm with feel the same way about touchy feely stuff as I do.
The rest of week is just physio, so I'm going to leave for Calgary right after my workout on Friday. Got a few things going on, but if you want to hangout or see me, you know to get in contact with me.

Back to the wheel of death

So we made it back to Edmondchuck alright. Thanks to the people who paid me a visit and took me to a movie(shark on my junk yo). I do feel recharged, just seeing my friends and family in person was so great, and sleeping in instead of doing a work out was nice too.
It looks like a light week, which will be nice, some of my muscle groups are still sore from Friday. Will be in Calgary again this weekend if all goes according to plan.
Also does anyone get the reference from the title?

In Calgary for the weekend

I made it back down to Calgary okay, the traffic was light because we left right after physio. I'm going to be in town till Monday night, that should be enough time to see people, get a few nights sleep in my own bed, sit on furniture not designed for a baboon. Really there no place is the apartment to sit or rest that feels comfortable, all the chairs are too low, or too small. The bed is excellent though, even if it doesn't help me sleep. That makes stuff all the sweeter when you get home and all the TV stations are back on the right channels, there is ample counter space to prepare your lunch, and you can blame the random things on a golden retriever who can't say anything in her own defense(ahh Sidny, how many times have you covered for me).
Physio this week was rather hard all around. I think the first two weeks caught up with me, and I have just been sore and very tired since Monday. I should be back up and running by Tuesday if i taken it easy for the next three days. I want to start increasing the weight I am using, but I had to hold back this week because of how I was feeling. I trust that the people there know what they are doing and that they wouldn't have just waste my effort and go through the motions with no benefit. I just think That I should be farther along, or more that I want to be farther along.
I am only part way through the program, so I do understand that results are not going to be apparent yet. And they may not be apparent even after six weeks. The main point of this program is to prepare me for the surgery, AND so that after I'm done boot camp I can keep up what I have learned back here in Calgary while I wait for delicious organs. But...I feel less confident going into the surgery because I am so out of shape. If I could see something definite (like weight lose, visible toning, a larger increase the weights), this would be off set significantly. So the only solution is to keep at it and not slack, keep it low key this weekend and hit back hard on Tuesday.

Silly update

I think that every guy wants to be in a action movie. Now I'm sure that there are some exceptions: the unimaginative, the cowardly, those already living a life that is unbelievably dangerous. But I like to pass the time waiting for the bus, in lines, waiting rooms, or any other decent day dream local thinking about how I could possibly face a group of armed terrorists at this exact moment. Or maybe its more along the lines of "If I floored it right now I bet I could take out that armored car and use the money I stole to buy machine guns". Or just looking at the landscaping or furniture arrangement of a building to plan the best escape route should a bomb suddenly start to count down to zero.
So it should not be surprising that I think of my medical treatment that way sometimes. "Oh good here is my next IV...of super soldier formula, MWAHAHAHA". Medical implants, yes I have several. There are the hips(with robo cop style holster), the eye implant(for more accurate targeting), and the internal IV port(for when I need a fast hit of nano bots).
Yes my sad little brain has me in a league of awesome well above the average moral. I do have a very well defined line between what is reality and what is fiction/illusion, and I have a very good idea of what personal limitations are as well ass how NOT to limited by them. But This is an easy way to give my life a hot and spicy injection of fun, so i roll with it when ever I can
Which is why my lung transplant is getting a better, official Un-Official, name. It is now being called: Operation North Sea Storm!
I know ya'll are just thinking "Jee wizz Pete, how did you come up with such a corker of a name?" well shut your noise hole and I'll tell you! I have to travel NORTH to go to Edmonton to do boot camp and the eventual surgery. I wanted to have a word in there like breath or wind, but those all sound stupid and weak, so we go with STORM. Also I needed to bring in vikings somehow(cause they rock my socks), and storms on the North Sea are rather famous for being badass.
So if'n you ever see a facebook status up date or blog post that says "Operation North Sea Storm is a go" that means I'm going up to Edmonton for new lungs.
Finally, I don't care if its in bad taste, I'll continue to pretend to have Nam flashbacks every time the STARS helicopter lands across the street, its friggin funny.
To Victory!

Upbeat post

Well It's not all panda bears and glitter, but I am going to try to keep the blog from becoming a bitch fest about stupid crap. Like how the I almost lost it today when the doctor was explaining the nature of the throat infection I have. One of my inhalers can cause yeast to grow in your mouth and throat, and he explained the how, the where, and the difference infection sites as the pertain to gender....I almost passed the maturity test and didn't break down laugh/make a cross contamination joke...ALMOST. In my defense my mom did the same thing.
The rest of the appointment was nothing special: I got as prescription filled, was told that I am OFFICIALLY listed as status Two(2), and that they would see me in two weeks(no clinic due to the holiday on Monday). I have one class this week, just something about family support(which I have like no bodies business). That being the case we are going to get packed up Thursday night and head back down to Calgary for the long weekend on Friday afternoon.
Now I'm not going to say party at my house just yet, but...there MAY be a party at my house on Saturday. Unless you have a cold or are otherwise carrying the plague, then just send good vibes out to me through the ether of the universe. I am in town till Monday afternoon, so if you want to hangout or whatever, call me, text me, otherwise drop me a line and we can set something up.
Hail Victory!

New digs

On Friday my dad came up from Calgary to help us move from St. Albert into Edmonton proper, right in across the street from the hospital actual. Was very good to see him again, added something...normal to a "new and scary" situation. Not gonna lie...I was really disappointed with the apartment. It was smaller than I had visualized, and despite the word 'loft' being in the name of the building I was still pissed when I saw the bedroom wasn't walled off. The whole set up of the place makes me feel like I'm having to run a serpentine, and I'm still catching my shins on the ugly furniture.
Now before I go any farther down the brat path, I will say that I am very very lucky to have this place. Even with how small it is I still only have one roomie, not five. Despite the noise from the street and traffic, I am only a half block walk from the Physio center. And all the other problems that jumped out at me right away are dwarfed by the advantages it has compared to my other housing options. And I need to, and will, make the very best of this.
Obvious solution to this problem is to not hang out in the apartment. And with the University Campus and Whyte Ave just a short walk away it should be easy to find something to do. Lots of WiFi location to plunk down at for an hour or two, some shops to go look in (but not buy, way too much shopping already), or just sitting out front with a slurpee people watching.
The BIG issue is that I don't, and cannot get what I need hear. And that is my comfort zone, my hide hole, my dedicated space. This would be like my office back home where i have my computer and TV set, my books and couch are there, I have what a need. I did a basic recreation of this where we stayed in St. Albert, just set up my stuff in the room I had, it was quiet and cool, and I could be alone.
I am not going to get that hear, and although I have TV again (never bothered to figure out the telus tv setup they had in ST Albert) the next 4 weeks are going to be rougher than the first two.
Thus ends the bitchy post, watch soon for more up beat update

suplimental blog post

yeah, my last post was rather poor in quality of information so here is a quick extra before I go in today. The doctors on monday didn't have much new info for me, other than that I should be classified and activated in the next few days. That means that I am in the running for donor organs once the people ahead of me on the list are cleared of course. The doctor I met with this week was new, but seemed rather reasonable in terms of abiity answer my questions, and wanting to put me at ease about the process.
Bloodwork, and medication levels are all looking good, so I can continue to reduce my steroids. They want me at about a 20-15 mg/day level(at this level complications from healing are minimized). I at 35 right now, so I need to get this down without causing any GVH issues. Thats the technical side of things i left out yesterday, more later
To Victory!

Boot camp: week two, electric boogaloo

wow I`m awesome for not updating, weee. So I`m not gonna lie, I`ve just been lazy about updating lately, by the time I get back home from the hospital I just want to have a snack and a nap and watch me some netflix. That being said you have pretty much been updated on what i have been doing since the last post. I attempted to venture out on the weekend, but having forgotten my map just drove around for an hour cursing the world and everything on it.
I did however make it out to whyte Ave yesterday. Very cool to see some of the shops out there, and found a huge comic store. And I am not messing around when i say huge, it had all the stuff youre little nerd heart could desire, except what nerd really need; soap(yuou think a soap maker would start doing superhero soap for these poor bastards, but no). I grab a few books and then head home. When I told the physio people today that i walked down about 5 blocks of whyte ave they all seemed so surprised. Makes me think that I am ahead of the curve health wise(or maybe just conditioning wise) then most of the people there.
Someone was even impressed that I go up and down stairs a still (I sleep downstairs at home and the place I am staying now). Yeah I stilll do stairs, a couple times a day, everyday...its not hard. Sure i rest after, and on a few occasions if I forget something downstairs and I dont really need it, I just go without. But really stair use is an achievement now(my computer has just gone sideways on me, punctuation is no out the window, apologizes)
i am progressing on the weights and walking times on the treadmill, and im still not feeling to tired or sore after the work outs. the classes they have using going to this week are fairly basic, lots of stuff i already know, but its a good review.Not much else to say, so Im just going to end it here 

Boot Camp: week one

So the first week has come and gone, and I survived. The work out every morning and a 6:45am rise has got me feeling a little tired, but now I two days to just relax and sleep in. Also its bullcrap that I can only sleep in till 8 after a week of getting up early. The work outs have been fairly manageable, the staff know how to get the most out of what the people have, and know that sometimes we just have to sit down and take a break.
My only worry is that I am only ever stuff after my work outs I'm not full on sore like  used to get. Now granted the level of stiffness we are dealing with here is to were I have to stretch out my legs a couple times a day just to that I can un-bend my knees, but I wonder if I am using enough weight.
Talk has been goinjg a round about getting a treadmill for back in Calgary, to keep up the daily workout rutine once I am back home. A rather expensive purchase, but i can get longer sustained distance with the treadmill over just walking on the street, the set pace helps me with setting a proper cadence, and isn't subject to being cancelled due to weather.
So for now things are going well, my mornings are filled with sweat, doctors, and feel good hand hold with social workers. While the afternoons and filled with napping and watching netflix. Next week is going to be a little busier, but for the most part my afternoons, and evenings are all my own. I Need to start finding locations to visit and explore around Edmonton to fill some of the time up. Otherwise I might get halfway through this thing and come down with hardcore cabin fever.

Boot Camp: day one

I got there on time, yaayyy! And went to the wrong appointment first, thus missing the orientation. So that was the thing that went wrong today, other than that everything was aces. I did a walk test, got my time table, saw the facility I'm going to using, met the staff, and get the all important parking pass, cause parking in the far lot is for suckers.
Now I can start to breath easier about the whole thing. I now know about how long I have to be at the hospital everyday, what I should bring with(based on what activities are on the docket), and most importantly|: there are old people in my group so even with purple converse, lulu shorts(with my legs), and not shaving for nearly two months, I am still not the worst dressed there.
Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday I'm there for longer. Physio in the morning first thing then something else in the later morning or afternoon. Every Monday is clinic (saw them today and they said I will likely have a change of status in the next week). Thursday/Friday seem to be wide open after physio for the most part so I am hoping to be able to go back down to Calgary for the weekends when I can. But I would think all plans of that nature depend on me keeping up with the program and feeling up for the ride.
Also here is some math for y'all to maul over|: iPad2 + Netflix = Awesome Sauce! (if you're confused remeber to do the work inside the brackets BEFORE you do the exponents. Ha math jokes)

Made it to Edmonton

Today we loaded up the Volvos and headed north. Trip was easy enough, even if I packed 2 hours before we left and i forgot a few things, which is cool cause I may get to come home on the weekends if i understand stuff correctly. But until monday rolls around nothing is solid. More than likely what causes me the most anxiety and issues is not having solid dates, yes/no answers always be contingent on other things, and not being able to make plans for the future.
Now that I am here I know where I'm going to sleep, that my O2 is set up properly, that i have internet access. Monday I will have a proper schedule on what they doctors up here want from me time wise, and then I can start to set things in motion for the next six weeks.

Saturday send off

I'll start by saying thank you to everyone who came out on Saturday to the BBQ, means a lot to have you all there. I know there are some people I forgot to tell, didn't have up to date contact info for, and couldn't make it due to illness: sorry about that, that ones on me, and I will try to see you all when I get home in September.
Additional thank are due to the overly generous people who have given me gift cards, books, games, etc(special shout out to the extended Braden clan, I was totally blown away when I got that bit of news). You didn't have to do that stuff, but I assure you that it goes a long, long way to alleviating my concern about how I will keep my sanity while I'm up north, Hurruah distractions!
And since this keeps coming up I'll cover it now. After the first week of the boot camp I should have a better idea of what my free time will be like in terms of what amount and when it occurs. Once I have that I will let everyone know. Quiet a few people have expressed interest in coming up to see me while they are passing through town, or have a spare day. A friend wished me well the other day and ended it with "To Victory!", seems rather appropriate when you have an army backing you up.
Again much love, everyone line up for hugs that last just a little bit too long to be comfortable.

Gearing up for Edmonton

Doing some of the final prep work for the six weeks in E-town. I have my banking and AISH stuff set up so that I don't have to be dealing with it through a third party. My mom has been shopping for "things we will need while we are up there". Got my cell phone contract renewed, and got a secondary 'bat-phone' set up for my doctors to reach me at.
The adventure plan seems to be to drive up there on the 13th, with both cars, meet the O2 supplier there and get that set up. That leaves us Sunday to do a dry run from where we are staying to the hospital/university. After the first week I should have a much clearer idea of what the day to day of boot camp is going to be like, and can figure out when I might be able to seek back down to Calgary.
For so long I have a had a good handle on what to do, and where and when to do it, with regards to the medical system and my own health. Just some hard earned bits of wisdom I have picked up over time. Now I'm wadding out into more unfamiliar territory. I have a direction I am heading, but it has non of the usual flavor I expect. This makes me less confident about some aspects of this whole thing. I trust in the doctors and their system completely, and I have no hesitation about moving forward with any of it, I may just be encountering a few more more 'brown trouser' moments than I am used to.
So to counteract this I look for consistent things in my life to ground myself with. My weekly game with friends, coffee outings, and visits to some shops that encourage my irresponsible spending are great for this while I am in Calgary. They give me something to look forward to and if nothing else they distract me from my bigger problems for a little while. Because I do not have this structure up in Edmonton, I am going to have to find or create while I am there. How easy this will be and what it will be comprised of is still an unknown, but I should look into it. Otherwise I will likely run out of(or get bored with)books to read, get tired of watching movies and TV, and generally become a sour pussy about everything. Not the mind set to be in for boot camp.

Change up and Bling

Saw my lung doc today, and he wants to put me back on Cyclosporine(an anti-rejection drug) as a way to be able to drop my steroid dose faster. I'm not a fan of that drug. It gives you headaches, it smells nasty even in pill form, and it makes your back look like an indoor/outdoor rug. But it won't retard the healing process after the surgery, so it is the better choice.
On the up side I got to have tea with a friend this week, and she gave me a very delightful gift. I would never recommend anyone getting me jewelry as a gift, I'm very particular about what I will wear, and usual don't have occasion to either. But this was one of the times were it was dead on. It was a pendant of lungs, not some but line but the raw organ. Picture here . It is silver (one of the few metals I wear), has that industrial/fringe feel I love, and just fits the present situation perfectly. It was a big hit at the lung clinic today as well. Just shows that no one knows you like an old friend.

Good news and set dates

I got a call from the program today saying that I am officially on the Lung Transplant list! Right now I'm classed as status 0/Zero, which means on hold. This can change with just one phone call and will be updated some time during the six week phisio boot camp. That will take place mid August. Now that I have the dates I can start looking(actively) for a place to stay for the six weeks. This should only be slightly awkward due to the Mid-month timing, not sure what kind of landlord wants to rent a decent place for just six weeks, so i may need to look at hotels, campus housing, executive suites.
So I have about two weeks to get all the stuff in place that needs to be done here in Calgary.(get a second cell phone, get some new work out clothes, load all my e-books onto my laptop, etc), then its a road trip up north and get going on the next big step of the process.

Bad Day

Yesterday was a little rougher than it could have been. A perfect storm of my own creation: I was worried about the number of new O2 tanks i had ordered (and that there wasn't enough for the week to come), I had been out and about everyday this week, and went to a movie on Friday. I SHOULD have changed out my large tank and taken a fresh one, rather than bringing one that was half full and a small take to change over to if needed. So I go see Captain America, and all I can through out the whole film is keep checking my tanks level. Add to this being hunched over in a theater chair for an hour and a half, and you get me having a panic attack because I don't think I can breath as well as I should.
So I leave the movie early, my fellow movie goer was very understanding about it all. I got home and felt better, had some dinner and lay on the couch. My chest still felt tight, so I got up and tried to loosen things up. Seemed to help a little but I begin to get worried and worked up again. I decided that at this point it was just best to take an Adivan. I don't like pills, but i would rather use a downer now and then to keep from having to go to the hospital for something that i can deal with at home.
I think one of the problems is that I get myself worked up and can't calm down. Its gotten to where my stomach is still tied up in knots from what happened yesterday. What I think would help is not having to talk about lung transplants every minute of the day. Have to deal with actual transplant or lung issues is fine. Seeing my doctor, doing tests, getting things in place for Edmonton is fine. I would just rather not have to talk about it if I can avoid it. It just makes me nervous and upset, to point where I lie in bed not sleeping because I'm shaking.
Wanna make me feel better? DON"T say I hope you feel better, tell me about your day, distract me, give me something else to maul over in my mind other than medical stuff. Medical stuff is downer at the best of times, and there is so much other more enjoyable things to talk about.
So at some point in the near future I need to go back and watch Captain America again, so no spoilers please.

It's bloody hot out

Yeah bad title but I cannot thing of a better one. No big updates this time, I saw my regular lung doc this week, he thought I was looking good. I seem to be fully over the cold now, and I am back to just about were I was oxygen wise before I got sick. So not bad. Its been about a month since I have fallen out of a daily walking routine, so i am going to fix that.
I figure a good way to do this is to post a realistic work out  regiment on here so that people can call me on it if I am not following through. So here it is: a small walk everyday(this could be 20 mins around the block, walking around while I shopping, etc) twice a day is better but I will see about that day to day, 30 situps(not a big number but its been a bit since i have done core), 15 push ups, 5 minutes on the wobble board(this is just fun). As well 2 -3 time a week I want to get out a do a 45min-1 hour long walk.
These aren't huge things, and would more than likely be negligible in a person of better health, but I am a cripple with bad lungs so it should really help out, AND its not difficult to accomplish, even on days when its 30 degrees out! Seriously what the hell nature, don't start something you can't finish

Out of the clink, AGAIN

Guess I wasn't as better as I/they thought I was, because last Thursday night I was having some distress with my breathing and had to go back into the hospital in the middle of the night. Before anyone has a freakout I am doing much better now, using less O2 than I was last week and have been given a proper goings over by several doctors, stuff is fine.
Due to the fact that I was still dealing with that cold I caught my noes was stuffed up completely, that makes it hard to get oxygen through nasal prongs. After a few hours of stressing about this and working my self up into a near panic attack, making my impair ability to breath that much worse, I had my dad take me into the hospital. Next time you see him tell he is awesome because he can't hear that enough after pushing me around in a wheel chair at 3 am when he has to work the next day.
They started me on IV anti-biotics, increase my steroids, and did a whole wack of blood work. After Five days of that I am doing much better. My noes is no longer stuffed up making it easier to breath, I am fully over that cold and all its effects,  and a few of the tests I had booked for later in the month got done early.
 Not my favorite way to spend the weekend, but over all I think I'm doing better than i was a week ago. Bad news is that this little scare has forced me to get a little more serious about preventative measures that I have to take to keep from getting sick again(because if I do they will ship my ass to Edmounton early and the bleak, friendless, grey-scape which is E-town sucks). So I will no longer be going to see Slayer/Rob Zombie at the end of the month. The crowds, the smoke(stage effects and weed), and the walking are a risk that I feel is okay, But the transplant doc does not, and he needs to know that my commitment to this is 100%. There will be other shows, and my friends that are going will tell me how it went. Now i just need to see if i can sell my ticket in time, Any takers?

Just when i think I'm out.....THEY PULL ME BACK IN!

So due to a delightful cold I caught after getting out of the hospital this week, I got to spend Sunday and Monday in the hospital. Thanks to the battery of tests I underwent last week I only had to get an X-ray and some blood work. They gave me some anti-biotic and told me that with my symptoms I should be on the up swing now and be back to normal in a few days. I go to see my regular doc at the Bone marrow clinic this week so I am not worried about this. Also got my oxygen people to swap out the old concentrator for a new one, because I really don't think it was doing a good enough job.
Not much else to report, would be nice to get out an enjoy some summer weather, or a good view of it from an air conditioned room.

Waiting for now.

So I am out of the hospital for good now. I finished all the tests they wanted and my doctor looked over them and didn't see anything that made him worry. Now all I have to do is wait. I am good at waiting in the short term, I have a bunch of books i need to read, TV dvds to watch, and plenty of other ways to keep myself busy. I should hear about progress on this by August, and the latest timeline has me going up to Edmonton in the fall some time. All my timelines are generalities and big cookie cutter blocks of time that get slide back and forth on the calender. It can be frustrating because most of the time things only seem to move one way, to the later date. BUT that being said every day the transplant is pushed into the future is another day that I can spend getting my self in better shape, preparing mentally for whats going to happen, and banking money to pay for expenses that come with all this.
I am officially on disability, so I do have some income, I am just going to have to not take the standard approach to how someone getting a government check spends it, meaning spunking it up the wall on drugs and useless crap. The stuff I like in life is cheap: coffee with friends, game night, seeing dump people trying to do something cool and getting hurt, etc. Keeping on a budget won't be an issue.
Its summer now, time to take advantage to the weather and get out and do stuff.

Almost out!

I, from being so big X h-core, have managed to get through all my tests done and could possibly be out of the clink tomorrow! My doctor still needs to review all the test together, make sure there isn't anything that he wants to have redone, or that there aren't any additional tests he wants to order, and then I am out of there.
There are still a few thing I have to do as an out-patient, but those can all be done close to me and without much hassle. Once they have those results, the doctors will bundle them all together and send it up to Edmonton so that the whole transplant team can review it. Once they do that there is a mega awesome teleconference event where i will be put on the list and classified as either stage 0, 1 or 2.
I'm glad I will be out, I miss how dark and quiet my room is at night. The food at the hospital isn't exactly top shelf(PS thanks to my awesome sister and brother for getting me actual food when the dinners i was brought sucked), and I'm not getting disturbed every few hours by some one taking my blood pressure. The nurse and staff at the hospital have been super, I have zero complaints about them.
Also I am going to have to find a way to were long sleeves and not die of heat stroke for the next or so, because i have junkie arms really bad. Seriously, there seven extremely visible needle marks on my arms right now. I would make the worst heroin addict

The first week of tests

So the first week of tests has come and gone, and I have to say it was a shit kicking. I'm glad it was done the way it was, they got so much done that I maybe out by the middle of next week. But getting woken up a 6am and not having my feet hit the ground till 3 or 4 O'clock in the afternoon. So on the days I had to not eat for tests i could go for 14-16 hours without eating. So I may have lost about 3 kilos. Nothing to worry about, I had some to spare, but being hungry all day makes getting stuck with needles or someone screwing up that much harder to deal with.
Family and friends have been great for support, and my doctor has been good about  letting me out in the evenings. But I do very much miss my own bed, my computer, and my routine.
Something I do want to clarify for everyone is that even though I am in a hospital and am having tons of tests run, and road in an ambulance(it was fun, EMTs are great people) I'm in no worse health than I was a few months ago. Yes my lung are trashed, but me getting worse is not what prompted this stay.
That is most likely why I have had a such a good attitude about this whole thing. It's not like the cancer where we were trying to play catch up and get in front of the disease. everything I am doing now is going to make me better. The recover from the transplant is going to put in a damn big hurt locker, but in the long run I am going have a quality of life i could only dream about now.

Thats all for now folks

Play off Beard

So the first day was not bad, hardly any probing, and it is looking like I will be allowed out most evenings. In other news I have started growing a play off beard...this is in addition to my regular beard. I figured this technique of garnering good luck has worked for every hockey team ever EVER, so I will do it too. I will keep growing it until the new lungs are in. And of course if you people out there would like to play along at home feel free to grow a solidarity beard yourself. One person has already started one, and remember your boss can't tell you not to do it because its all for a good cause. Your boss doesn't hate sick people...does he?

Peter B

More information

So here is some more information about what is going on with me right now. Most of you should know by now that I am a two time cancer survivor, but that I didn't come through unscathed. Both my hips had to be replaced, my sight and hearing have decreased, and most significantly my lungs were damaged.
Because of all these issues have to see a couple different specialist, and a few months ago my lung doc brought up the subject of lung transplantation. I was not even aware that a transplant was an option for me, but a few weeks later I had a appointment to see the transplant team.
Tomorrow I begin the one of the first steps, I'm checking into the hospital for a week (maybe two) so that they can run a whole bunch of test to get an over all assessment of my health. They need to rule out any hidden problems or health problems that might bar me from reciving a transplant. So I'm going to get scanned and scoped and poked and generally touched by strangers.
After all that is done the results will go up to Edmonton, a team of doctors will classify me and place me somewhere on the list. Then I go live in E-town for six weeks at "transplant boot camp" to get in fighting shape and learn all i can about my new life after transplantation. Some of this stuff is old news to me, i have done two other transplants (bone marrow) before, some of it is all new.

Thats it for now, depending on whether or not the hospital has internet, or if there is a place to scam wireless near by I might not update till I'm out.
Peter

First post!

okay this is the first post of my new blog. The main idea behind what I am  going to be doing with this is let the people i know what is happening regarding my health and what stage i am at with regards to my lung transplant. I don't talk with all of you on a regular basis so this can be a way for you to keep up with me, ask question, etc. The other purpose is for me to keep a record of what I am feeling and thinking  as i go through a very life changing event.
The next post I do will more general information about what my current health is like and what will be happening in the near future.
Peter
PS: this is NOT a spelling and grammar exercise, pointing them is a dick move and you have to be nice to me cause I'm sick