Peter on Pain

A big part of recovery is pain management, and this is the part of my journey with that. The pain I have is transitory, which should subside over time as I heal. As opposed to chronic pain which never goes away. They require to very different managment styles. So when I say something works for me or doesn't work for me in this post it is because, like all medical stuff, variation from person to person is a factor. My point is don't use my examples as a template for a all pain sufferers, or as a how to for dealing with your own pain issues, I'm not an expert.

I am unsure of exactly what and how much I was being giving while on ICU, that week was a bit of a blur. I do know that my supposed allergy to Morphine and Dilaudid were not an allergic reaction after all. It just what happens when you have a whole lot of them and don't eat. So I had my share of both of those during my first week of recovery. Nice to know that those options are open to me again.

 Once I was transfered onto the the transplant unit I was given the choice of Percoset, Dilaudid, T3s, possibly some others I'm not sure. I do know that they did a piss poor job explaining my option to me. This is likely to be my only real grip with the unit, they let me(and I have to assume other patients as well) get into a such a state before they start to push pain meds. Now maybe this is so we don't have a unit of people all hooped up on goof balls when htey don't need it, but when it feels like they are trying to keep my pain managment options a secret, I call fool. 2am is not the best time to explain what you can do for me: I'm half asleep, heavely distracted by pain or loopy from meds.Apparently you can only get one kind of painkiller every so many hours, BUT that doesn't mean you can have a different type for "break through" pain management. That was the fun little secret they were keeping from me as I count the minutes till I can have something to get me to relax and stop arching my back and breathing as shallow as possible. It took about 6 days before I finally said "Do not wait for me to ask for painkillers. You just bring them to me at a set time, EVERY time. If i need more after that I will ask for more".

My thinking on this, and it has been backed up by medical professionals, is that if I am in pain and stressed out my body is not using all its energy where it should. The energy it should be using to heal is being redirected to deal with pain. Another big problem is that if I am in pain, i don't eat, another big hindrance in the healing process. If I keep myself pain free I will get better faster. How do i keep myself pain free? By taking the painkillers on a set schedule, even if I don't feel like I am in pain right then, I stay ahead on the wave and never end up in pain. Having to play catch up with pain killers sucks. It is a struggle just to get a functional level and then I find that the dose doesn't last long enough. A lot of the guys on the ward like to play cowboy and just tough it out. For me that might make you tough, but it sure doesn't make you look smart.

I could guess why some people wouldn't want to use painkillers. They are some damn powerful drugs. The first few time I had a Micheal Jackson hot shot (I.V. Dilaudid) I was rocked. I had messed up dreams about fighting terminators, were I could smell the gunsmoke and feel the chips of concrete spray against my skin from the bullets ricocheting. Generally they get you in a state of mind that isn't nice. I was much happier when I just got a dose of meds every six hours, often I didn't need the break though/additional painkillers if I did that.

I currently take 40mg of Percoset in a 24 hour period, that is two pills every 6 hours or so. I have been trying to switch to once a day using T3s instead, but every time that leads to a wet bucket of suck. I get cranky and sore, I don't feel like eating, everything gets hard to do/deal with. So I will be sticking with my current dosage for a another week and then I will give it another try. The doctors have not expressed any concern over how much painkiller I am using so I don't think its an issue. Any of the side effects from the meds have been minimal, and I don't feel loopy when I take them, so no reason to change whats working.