So...that last post was something. I should start by saying that this was not directed at or triggered by anybody. I am sorry if anyone was hurt or felt attack by my words. I'm not sorry I said them thought. That was how felt at the time, and that makes it true. It was an honest representation of my condition, and that is what this blog is for, to give a picture of my recovery to those who care. And right now...stuff blows.
The lungs are working better than Swiss watch made by magical dwarfs, but my limiting factor doesn't stem from there, right now it is energy. Because of what my doctors think, and I hope, were medication related side effects I have had GI problems for a few weeks. Nothing like breaking free from O2 hose only to shackled to the toilet. This has led to me being dehydrated, severely, I can't keep up the intake to offset the out put. In addition my throat still hurts from the tubes. Ten weeks out and it is still a problem that keeps me from eating very much. And the stomach cramping doesn't help either or that meds make food taste like ash flavoured razor blades. So I'm drinking less and eating very little, I'm losing fluid at a rate that a one liter bag of IV fluid did make me have to pee till the next day, this adds up to me feeling as bad as I did during my last bone marrow transplant.
With these complications it makes it terribly hard to pull myself out of bed in the mornings. You ever hear that saying "the blankets were heavy this morning", yeah I literally feel that, moving a duvet off me takes effort. That is what happens when you lose 30 pounds in 10 weeks(that also makes me feel cold all the time). Mornings are very difficult to get through, not like the rest of the day is always a picnic but really dread mornings. I have to get up early for something I don't want to do> Its like a having a job you hate and there is no opportunity to steal pens or rubber bands.
Somehow I end up in the gym 5 days a week, and try to complete most of the workout. I spend and hour and a half trying to eat lunch everyday, but I'm still eating. Any thing I drink makes me feel bloated, and I am never without a glass of water. I can and will get through this, I am just up to my neck in it right now.
Related updates to come.
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